The latest revelations in the Manti Te’o girlfriend hoax are that the alleged mastermind, Ronaiah Tuiasosopo (a male), was the voice of Lennay Kekua all along. In an effort to save future gullible males from suffering a similar fate, I have put together a list of warning signs for those in an online relationship.
Fellas, keep your eyes open for these red flags!
10 Surefire signs you’re being “Catfished”:
10) Her profile picture is a pair of hooters. From Hooters.
9) She’s constantly clearing her voice.
8) She tells you she shaved today…and specifies her legs.
7) She can only FaceTime at night…from her basement.
6) She never got into Twilight because sexy vampires “just aren’t her thing.”
5) She tells you about the practical jokes she loves to play on her friends.
4) Said friends affectionately refer to her as “Douche Bag.”
3) Tells you her parents always wanted a daughter…I mean, a son.
2) She says she’s going to Target. And she’ll call you back in five minutes. She does.
1) She thinks “BJ Week” is a real thing.