NFL Free Agency: Free for All. But Not Free — at All.

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A new NFL season is upon us.

With NFL free agency signings slowing down a bit, I thought it would be a good time to step back and review what we’ve learned so far about the 2014 season.

John Elway and Bill Belichick are already engaged in a season-long chess match. So far, the Denver Broncos have claimed Aqib Talib, T.J. Ward, and DeMarcus Ware, leading us to believe that “offense wins games — defense wins championships,” may be their mantra this year.

Meanwhile, the Patriots gathered Darrelle Revis, Brandon Browner, and Brandon LaFell. And according to their former cornerback, Aqib Talib (who claims he does not have a hip problem), the Patriots report fake injuries. Which surprises no one.

Michael Vick will stay in green and white, but he won’t be wearing number 7. Vick may challenge Jets quarterback Geno Smith for the starting job — but says he won’t challenge him for his number. Also, the Jets aren’t happy unless they have a full-fledged quarterback controversy on their hands. And ESPN camped out at training camp.

Mark Sanchez will also stay in green and white, as he heads from the Jets to the Eagles, where he will compete  for the job of backup quarterback to Nick Foles with Matt Barkley. Apparently, the job requirements for backup quarterback of the Philadelphia Eagles include good hands (for clipboard holding), playing for USC, and being really, really, ridiculously good looking.

Speaking of ridiculously good looking…in releasing wide receivers Steve Smith, Brandon LaFell, Ted Ginn, and Domenik Hixon, the Carolina Panthers must think quarterback Cam Newton really is Superman and that he can throw the ball and catch the ball — himself. No one will be more impressed than Gisele Bundchen if Newton is indeed able to pull this off.

The NFC North is playing musical chairs (or musical ends), with Julius Peppers going to the Packers, Jared Allen to the Bears, and the Vikings still deciding which Packer they will sign this season.

Denver running back Knowshon Moreno is taking his talents (and his tears) to Miami.

Former Jacksonville Jaguars quarterback Blaine Gabbert is still in the NFL, now backing up Colin Kaepernick at the San Francisco 49ers. And making twice as much money — for now.

Cowboys owner Jerry Jones signed former Browns quarterback Brandon Weeden to ride his bench. And his unicorn.

If you’re a veteran player, prepare to sign a short contract, with one year deals becoming incredibly popular this offseason. There’s a reason they call the NFL “Not For Long.”

And not for long just got, well — less long.

Stay tuned.

XO

We’re crushing: on Brandon Marshall

Bears stylemaster Brandon Marshall. (Photo: @cjzero)

Bears stylemaster Brandon Marshall
(Photo: @cjzero)

The evening belonged to Coach Ditka. But Chicago Bears wide receiver Brandon Marshall certainly stole the spotlight when he showed up for the Bears’ Monday Night Football game at Soldier Field.

Known for his swag, both on the field and off, Marshall has already established himself as an NFL style icon. But on Monday night…he broke the swag meter.

(Photo: @BuzzFeedSports)

(Photo: @BuzzFeedSports)

Marshall was absolutely styling in a red double-breasted coat with a “turnt up” collar, complete with dress shirt, bow tie, matching gloves, and specs.

And he didn’t disappoint on the field either. Marshall had with six catches for 100 yards in the Bears’ 45-28 victory over the Dallas Cowboys.

With game time temperatures hovering around 15 degrees (and below zero with windchill), Marshall proved no match for the Cowboys or the elements.

The colder it is…the hotter he gets.

Brandon Marshall. Swagmaster.

XO