The next NFL scandal…pursegate

Kate Moss toting a now banned oversize Chanel handbag

Kate Moss toting an oversized Chanel handbag now banned by the NFL.

He changed the overtime rules, the definition of a fair tackle, even kickoffs. We handled it. No problem. But when NFL Commissioner Roger Goodell went after our handbags…the ladies of the NFL united and rose up in outrage.

Where is the liberty? This is America…land of the free. We are home of the Big Mac, the gas guzzling SUV, the California king bed…and the giant, floppy handbag.

The NFL announced this week that in order to “enhance public safety” and ease stadium entrance, they will restrict the size and type of bags taken into stadiums beginning this preseason.

The NFL approved tote

*The NFL approved tote

Acceptable bags are defined as:

  •  Bags that are clear plastic, vinyl or PVC and do not exceed 12” x 6” x 12.” (*Official NFL team logo clear plastic tote bags are available through club merchandise outlets or at nflshop.com), or
  • One-gallon clear plastic freezer bag (Ziploc bag or similar).
  • Small clutch bags, approximately the size of a hand, with or without a handle or strap can be taken into the stadium with one of the clear plastic bag options.

Is a ziplock bag a handbag? No. It is not. And you will not see me carrying one. Even with a chain handle. Is this just an attempt by the Commissioner to sell you an ugly beach tote and call it a handbag? No. It is not.

This is a matter of public safety. Football is America’s sport. On Sundays, NFL fans pack stadiums with 60-80,000 fans, all cheering for their team. And all wanting to feel safe while doing it. The Boston Marathon bombing opened up a new chapter in security at public events, much like 9/11 did at airports.

College stadiums have long restricted large purses and bags, mostly to avoid alcohol coming in. But also as a matter of safety in stadiums that hold 100,000 people or more.

We can do this, ladies. It’s time for us to take one for the team, or for the sport we love. In the meantime, they may want to add some security to the Commissioner’s staff. Because right now he is at a high risk of being beaten with a large, oversize handbag.

But it’s not Roger Goodell who is taking away your freedom. It’s the deranged lunatics of the world who harm innocent people as sport. So if you’re going to take your anger out on anyone, it should be them.

We are Americans. We figured out freedom. Keeping it…is another matter entirely.

Thankfully, the clutch is in.

A word of advice for the Commissioner though…don’t even think about touching our shoes.

XO

4 comments

  1. Kelly says:

    I can’t believe they are banning seat cushions! Hello, Lambeau benches at 10 below? Esp. for the elderly season ticket holders!

  2. Kendra says:

    I read about this, Heather. Yes, many women are a bit peeved …but at least there are ways we can avoid displaying our tampons and other things in those clear bags 😉 …this ban may actually help my patented problem solver get better known… !
    Stop by and help yourself… http://www.portapocket.com
    ♥ @PortaPocketGal

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